Honestly, I have no idea whether I’m the best person to give advice on disappointment or not.. But seeing as over the past two months, disappointment completely tore my life apart, I’ll give it a go! Did I handle it well? Absolutely not. Did I cry or get upset? No, not at first, which was probably my one of my biggest mistakes. I should of got angry at the fact that I missed out on the course I had longed for all year, by only five points. But no, I acted as if I was happy, this was in an effort to convince myself I was happy. Maybe if I gotten angry and sad straight away, my feelings wouldn’t have grown with such intensity.
I feel like social media is one of the worst culprits in strengthening the pain of disappointment. When the Leaving Cert., results came out, everyone posted online about how happy they were and this continued following CAO offers. Don’t get me wrong, fair play to them! They worked hard and deserved to get what they wanted and be happy. But I couldn’t stop thinking where is my happiness? I worked extremely hard, so where was my reward? They say “What’s for you won’t pass you” and I kept thinking “Well why did it pass me?!” Once again, as soon as college had started everyone’s Snapchat Stories looked so much more fun and enjoyable than my own college experience. I had one thought that I could fall back on, I knew that what people post online, wasn’t always true. No one depicts their life to be completely awful online, even when it might be.
So here’s my advice to you, if you are feeling really down and disappointed:
- Let yourself cry & be disappointed
With time, the pain does go away, trust me. You are allowed be disappointed for a time
- Talk about it
I never hid the fact I was utterly disappointed from my family, friends or even just acquaintances from school. People do use this (not talking) as a mechanism to deal with disappointment, but I don’t think that is healthy. Even if you choose not to tell people, I think it is important to tell your family. Remember as the Cycle Against Suicide message states “It’s ok not to feel ok & it’s ok to ask for help”.
- Acceptance
Face the facts, it may be hard but, this is your life now & face it head on. Do the best you can, because at the end of the day, that is all you can ever do!
- Be positive
I’m not saying force yourself to like your situation, but if you come at it at angle with a positive mindset. It is better than a negative one. It can’t hurt to try it. Maybe you will enjoy it! You’ll never know unless you try!
My best piece of advice is to trust your gut. You just know if something isn’t right for you. Think about yourself, who cares what people will say or think. In reality you not truly value what you or your family & friends think. They are the people & opinions that matter most!! I hope this advice helped, if not, remember everyone is trying to find their own way in this tricky muddled world. You will get through this my friend. Best of luck! X
Peppering My Thoughts 